Parenting Looks Better in the Rearview Mirror

New survey data suggest that how rewarding parenting feels may depend a lot on where you are in life—and the resources you have.

Ask parents whether raising young children is more rewarding or more challenging, and most come down on the side of rewarding—but perhaps not as overwhelmingly as our cultural narratives about parenthood might suggest.

In a recent nationally representative Verasight survey, 64% of respondents with children said the rewards of parenting young children outweigh the challenges. Another 25% said the rewards and challenges are about equal, while 11% said the challenges outweigh the rewards.

But those topline numbers obscure a striking divide: parenting looks considerably more rewarding to older adults than to younger ones.

Among respondents ages 18–29 with children, just 44% said the rewards outweigh the challenges. That rises to about 62% among those ages 30–64—and 78% among adults 65 and older.

Meanwhile, 21% of the youngest group said the challenges actually outweigh the rewards, compared with just 6% of adults 65+.

Why do older adults believe parenting is more rewarding?

There are several possible explanations for this age gap.

Older adults may be remembering the experience of raising young children from a distance, after the sleepless nights, childcare logistics, tantrums, financial strain and relentless daily responsibilities have faded. Younger adults are more likely to be living closer to those demands right now.

But we can't know that from these data alone. The difference could also reflect generational attitudes toward parenting, different economic circumstances that differ by generational cohorts, or other factors. The overall American parenthood culture has shifted considerably over the years, which may also be driving these findings.

What we can say is that the age relationship is robust: even after accounting for income, education, gender, race/ethnicity and political affiliation, age remained a significant predictor of viewing parenting as more rewarding than challenging.

For every additional decade of age, respondents had approximately 19% higher odds of saying the rewards outweigh the challenges.

Money appears to matter, too

The experience of parenting also looks different depending on household income.

Among respondents with household incomes below $50,000, 52% said parenting's rewards outweigh its challenges. That increased to 65% among those earning $50,000–$99,999, 67% among those earning $100,000–$149,999, and 79% among households earning $150,000 or more.

The multivariate analysis adds an important wrinkle: the clearest independent difference was at the top of the income distribution. After accounting for other demographic factors, respondents in households earning $150,000+ had approximately 2.4 times the odds of saying parenting's rewards outweigh its challenges compared with those earning under $50,000.

Money can't make a toddler sleep through the night or eliminate the emotional weight of raising another human being. But it can buy childcare. It can make an unexpected expense less destabilizing. It can provide more choices around work, housing, activities and help. In other words, money may not remove the challenges of parenting, but resources can change the conditions under which those challenges are experienced.

Maybe parenting isn't the problem

One of the things I find most interesting about these results is what they don't show.

They don't suggest that parents broadly regret having children or find parenting more challenging than rewarding. Most don't.

But they do complicate the expectation that parents—especially those actively immersed in raising young children—should experience parenthood as unambiguously rewarding.

Sometimes the rewards and challenges coexist. Sometimes the challenges temporarily feel bigger. And sometimes what we describe as the difficulty of parenting may actually be the difficulty of parenting without enough time, money, childcare, flexibility or support.

That distinction matters. Because if parenting looks more rewarding from a distance—and more rewarding when families have greater financial resources—the question may not simply be “How can parents enjoy parenting more?” It may also be: What would we need to change about the conditions of raising children so that more parents can experience the rewards while they're actually living them?

MotherLens /BLS Research & Consulting analysis of data from a nationally representative Verasight survey of U.S. adults conducted in August 2026. Analysis includes respondents who did not select “I don't have children” when asked about the rewards and challenges of parenting young children. Percentages are survey-weighted; subgroup sample sizes and additional methodological details are available upon request. Multivariate analysis controls for age, gender, household income, education, race/ethnicity and political affiliation. Gender was not a significant predictor in the adjusted model.